Update #169 - Short vs. Long Term Win

“Depart from evil and do good; seek peace and pursue it.” Psalm 34:14

California Coastline near Pescadero

I am a tidy person (I would say “clean” but my mom would argue the point due to the level of dust I am comfortable with letting settle on my furniture). In my world things have places and they should return there when you finish using them… not some obscure place you randomly set them down. In my world counters are clear, table tops are viewable, and desks are relatively free of clutter – and filing is mandatory. Yes, I have “piles” (as my mother affectionately refers to my “in progress” stuff) of paper needing to be tackled, but they are usually encased in a file folder, envelope or three ring binder.

Just recently I realized my “tidy factor” just isn’t in the physical – it spills over into the emotional realm as well.

I don’t care for conflict. I don’t care for confrontation. I don’t like skirmishes, clashes, discord, tension or fracas of any kind. I like peace. Unfortunately, peace is usually fought for and hard won. It doesn’t come naturally and we have an enemy constantly working against its manifestation.

Like I said before – I like things tidy; including relationships. When there is discord, misunderstanding or a rift I want to fix it – PRONTO. I want resolution, reconciliation and restitution to happen. I want peace and the row to disappear. Usually I am the one, even if I was the individual hurt, seeking out the other party to make the mess go away.

God called me out on this.

In my “uncomfortableness” I was superseding God’s timing. I wanted peace and I went after it thinking it was what God wanted too. It wasn’t. In fact, I messed things up and made the rift wider due to my actions. If I had checked with God, gained more clarification and followed his instructions I would be in a better place than I am in now.

God’s timing is perfect. God’s ways are best. God is good and he only gives good things – he doesn’t want us to suffer, he doesn’t want us to be in pain, he doesn’t want us to be miserable. But, sometimes he allows it because in the end it will bring us closer to him.

Well, I can tell you, the dialogue between God and I has been constant. The back and forth about the relationship has been heated. My “TO DO” list is ready to be populated (did I mention I am action oriented and “wait” is almost like a swear word for me?) and nothing is forth coming.

What feels like a mess to me God sees as an opportunity. What feels like disharmony and disagreement God sees as an opening into a heart. I need to ask myself, “What is best for the other person in this situation?” Or better yet, “What does God want?”

His timing is perfect. Periods may have to pass – days, weeks, months, maybe even years – for God to get the work done he needs to so the reconciliation we seek has lasting impact, not just be a short-lived Band-Aid of a victory.

Am I uncomfortable – yes. Are all my relationships squared, tidy and bow worthy – nope. Am I where I am supposed to be – certainly. It isn’t an easy place to live but I trust God’s plan and know he will bring peace because that is what he wants too.

Where are you superseding God’s timing? Where do you need to ask for clarification and direction? Are you pursing long-term or short-win peace projects?

Updates:

Travel – Currently in Johannesburg and on my way to Cape Town, South Africa on Friday afternoon. Brett, Lyn and I are meeting with alumni, local businesses, and local intercessors. My jet leg is minimal – which is SO nice – it hasn’t kicked in until around 9pm… and I am sleeping relatively well at night; Praise Jesus!

Work – We had our second all day Saturday training last weekend – it went well - the intercession team and I had quite a “party” in the back room (who says prayer is boring?!). I am in South Africa until the 11th and then head back to the States to run our training retreat weekend, affectionately called “The Big Weekend. Brett and Lyn return shortly before it starts only to be off the following weekend to the KEYS conference in LA.

Marketplace Impact – South Africa – April 2007. A man comes to the rep venture unexcited, unhappy and reluctant – and very ill (the intercession team prays for him and he heads off to the doctor who diagnoses him with bronchitis and cautions him to stay in bed). He awakes the next morning completely well; needless to say, God had his full attention. The venture was life changing - he surrendered control of his business to God and within weeks he received the needed funding and within four years he sold his start up for several million Rand. What are you holding onto that God could steward better and grow more efficiently?

Requests:

Travel – Abolishment of all jet lag, solid night sleeps, good interaction with alumni and for a fun weekend of rest with my friend Rebecca.

Personal – to be fully present in the moment and not distracted by what’s next on the schedule (and what needs to be done in preparation), to understand what God is doing and follow him fully, to hear God’s voice and be obedient.

Work – for alumni galvanization - for them to reconnect and feel a part of what we are doing, not just in the Bay Area but worldwide. Also, for our upcoming Repurposing Business Intensive.

Update #168 - Shield of Offense

“For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Matthew 6:14-15

Beach at Corona del Mar, Orange County, CA

Belt of truth – check. Breastplate of righteousness – check. Shoes of peace – check. Shield of faith – check. Helmet of salvation – check. Sword of the Spirit – Hey! Where is my sword? Why is this extra shield stuck to my arm????

I am left handed, so when I go through the above “putting on” exercise in the morning I have my shield of faith on my right arm and I am usually gripping the sword of the spirit in my left hand. But, this particular morning I had shields on both arms, and unable to pick up or grasp my sword.

The unidentified interloper of a shield was almost identical to the one I usually carried – round, sturdy, “Dena-sized,” and clamped firmly to my forearm (I tried shaking it off – it didn’t budge); but unlike the other it had writing on the back - right at eye level. “They didn’t call.” “They lied.” “They acted in anger.” “They yelled.” “They stole.” “My name irrevocably slandered.” “They damaged my property.” “They treated my loved ones with disrespect.” “They have hidden rules they expect others to live by.” “They didn’t include me.” “They are selfish.” The list continued across and round the shield. Each entry had a date and name next to it. I recognized each statement, name and event. The last entry was dated the day before.

Oh, this is a shield of offense. Lovely – I have let the sin of offense make my sword hand inactive. Now, I am only able to defend myself and not act offensively in any way to any onslaught the enemy may send. Great. Nice job Dena; way to render yourself battle inactive.

In my eyes, and in several around me, I had every right to feel hurt and in need of protective armor after what had been rendered me the day before. I did have every right to feel hurt, but I had no right to hold offense. That is God’s job.

God says I need to forgive those who hurt me, slander me, persecute me, beat me, malign me, abuse me, and torture me (physically, emotionally and /or spiritually). I don’t have to trust them, hang out with them, or seek their company /companionship – but I do have to honestly, tried and true forgive them from the depths of my heart.

Why? Because I want to be forgiven by God: “For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Matthew 6:14-15

Whoa. I want to be forgiven by God – so no matter what the creep from the day before had done to me I needed to forgive them. Very. Hard. Pill. To. Swallow.

To be completely transparent, I was deeply offended, incredibly hurt and in a lot of emotional pain. And, I was angry. “God, you saw what happened. You know my heart. I did not deserve that – AT ALL. I am pretty toasted about the whole scenario if you want to know the truth. I want to slice and dice them six ways from Sunday – and then come back and stomp on them like they did me! But, I CHOOSE to forgive their actions toward me and release them into your hands to deal with. I CHOOSE to bless them and ask you to do what is right and best for them. But keep ‘em away from me.”

I heard a small click, snap - the shield unclasped itself from my left forearm; a hollow thud marked its landing. I picked up my sword – played the handle in my hand, and smiled for the first time of the day. “Finally, dressed and ready for the day.”

What offenses do you carry – do you have one shield, or several lining your arm? Are you tired? I can only imagine the fatigue of having to fight, defend, posture and position to keep the arrows of the enemy and your offenders at bay. Who do you need to forgive, really truly forgive, so God can forgive you? This infinitely important – your eternal future is at stake.

Updates:

Travel – Currently in Orange County, CA enjoying the sunshine (and the wind), friends, and great local food!

Personal – I am so enjoying my new camera. It takes incredible pictures and I am having fun cropping and playing.

Work – Training is going well, the Nigerian and South African trips are coming together, and plans for trips to Egypt and Indonesia are being chatted through. Things are still a bit crazy but mellowing a bit.

Marketplace Impact – Indonesia – June 2009 – God woke me up in the middle of the night and told me to write down some verses and to give a gift to a leader in a local company; a devoted Muslim none the less. The next day I approached him and shared that God had asked me to give him the verses and gift. The man’s response was “God knows me? God knows my name? I speak to him three times a day and he never talks to me.” Later one of the executives came joyfully into the empty conference room where we were working. He asked me why I had chosen the verses I had. I related the story. He beamed and said he had wanted to share Christ with his boss for months but God had told him to wait. That morning, just after the man left me he motioned the executive into his office – “Explain this to me” he asked – the executive did and in the process was able to share the Gospel message! Sometimes you just scatter the seed; other times you water it!

Requests:

Travel – This week Brett and Lyn come back from visiting her parents in Hawaii, I come back from Southern California only to have Brett and Lyn off to Nigeria next week and Jackson off to SoCal sunshine. Please pray for travel safety and possible upgrades for Brett and Lyn!

Personal – The increda-push the first 8 weeks of the year brought has passed (Thank God) and we are in a good position going forward. The main concern for me is what is on God’s heart? I want the ability to hear and pursue it without pause – and leave anything else I may feel is “necessary or pertinent” for a later date / time.

Work – A large Bay Area Christian Conference is this upcoming weekend – Brett is speaking and several of the staff are attending and filling many roles. Pray the time will be effectively used, our booth will have a lot of traffic, and people will be really blessed through the conversations had, prayers prayed, and materials given.

Update #167 - Complacency

“The thief does not come except to steal and to kill and to destroy. I have come so that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.” John 10:10

Rancho San Antonio Reserve, Cupertino, CA

In the daydream Jesus and I were standing on a bluff overlooking acres and acres and acres of vineyards. Rolling hills dotted with vine posts stretched for miles to my left and right. It was an exquisite Californian day; sun shining, mid 70’s, light breeze, nothing marring the beautiful blue canopy. It was absolutely picturesque - except for the ugly black and brown, it looked to be, stone edifice / building on my right.

It was monstrous, bulky, and out of place. It was a blot on the landscape, huge and horrid contrasted with verdant vines and golden hills. I stared at it trying to figure out what the designing architect had in mind.

Then it moved.

Well, shifted actually; what appeared to be the buildings upper portions transferred from the right side to the left. I blinked to clear my vision. I blinked again.

“Jesus, um, Jesus” I pulled on his sleeve. “Am I losing it? The building moved.” I mouthed almost speechlessly and pointed to the huge object.

In response, he touched my shoulder and pointed with his other hand to the vine suspension wires. Leaning into my ear he said “Look Dena, really, really look.”

I blinked again and saw the entire landscape differently. It wasn’t gorgeous, it wasn’t attractive, it wasn’t even moderately pretty. It was a scene from a nightmare.

The vine posts were actually cradles, hundreds of millions of occupied rocking cradles; back and forth, back and forth, slowly oscillating their occupants into a contented stillness.

The cribs were all connected along never-ending rows of vine wire. The cable fed from one crib to another to the end of each row. Then it continued to a merging point in front of the unsightly edifice. A single mammoth-sized lead fed forward into the building itself.

The vine wires were controlled via the building!

I blinked again. The building wasn’t actually a building but a huge monster. A huge very bored monster tasked with gently pulling a cable. The shift I saw was it transferring its weight from one leg to another as it crouched above the ground.

“This is freaky.” I commented. “What are you showing me?”

Jesus didn’t open his mouth but his eyes locked mine and I immediately understood what I was viewing. The cradles were full of people asleep to what true life is, asleep to what abundant life in Christ can be, asleep in contentedness brought on by busyness, friends, family and obligation. And Satan was behind it all.

He kept their lives littered with the meetings, the coffees, the friends, the Bible Studies, the church activities. He kept them involved in “good things” so they would miss the greatest thing, Jesus. Satan kept them pacified enough so they were appeased, they wouldn’t seek more, the greater, the best. He kept them busy enough so they didn’t feel they had the time to discover, unearth, really come to know and understand what they were missing.

“This is SO WRONG!” I screamed with tears in my voice.

As happens in daydreams, I was now down in the valley at the apex of the vine wires; wire cutters in hand. I cut the cords and one by one the cradles slowed and came to stillness.

Then the screaming started. Shrieks, wails, keening rose from the millions of cradles. It was unbearable and deafening.

I covered my ears and looked to Jesus my cheeks wet with tears.

“We just disrupted their lives. They are upset and don’t understand the real plan behind what we did.” As he said this he walked to the nearest cradle, lifted the infant/adult from it and stood them on their feet. He gently straightened their clothes, looked them straight in the eye and told them what they were really called to, what they were really meant to live for, what they were missing. He gave simple instructions, hugged the man and went to the next cradle.

The man, indignant at first, softened while Jesus talked to him, nodded in agreement and moved to help the occupant in the cradle to his right. I watched the progress spread across the plain - now three awake, six, twelve, twenty-four. Some took longer to get upright, but they heard the screaming and wanted it to end. As the new little army spread across the cradleyard the screams grew more and more distant to my ears.

This gave me pause. Am I in a cradle? Or am I rescuing people from them? Even better, am I empowering people to rescue others? Am I rocked by complacency in any area of my life? Or am I instilling change? Am I silencing the screams in others souls by sharing the real truth?

Where are you? What actions can you take to still the screams, instill change, and share truth? Can you hear the screams of those around you are you rocked in complacency and content; unable to hear, respond, and act?

Updates:

Travel – Invites are solidifying and others are cropping up!

Personal – Enjoyed my day off (Tuesday) with a walk (and my new camera) at a local land reserve. So nice!

Work – Training KICK OFF went very well and we have ~27 trainees this cycle! We have a lot on the remote call so please pray for our distance learning facilitators, tech guys, and trainee coaches.

Marketplace Impact – Older story – Victor works at a remotely placed car dealership in South Africa, sales are down, inventory up. He sends his sales staff to a nearby car show on a Saturday morning leaving his accountant to cover the dealerships sales floor. Earlier in the week two of our rep consultants visited the business and asked where he (the owner) needed a miracle. That Saturday the accountant produced 60% of month’s sales. Need a miracle? Ask!

Requests:

Travel – Please pray for invites to solidify, dates to be determined and for us to have the discernment to know which we are to accept and deny (and for me to know which ones have my name on them).

Personal – I am facing a lot of travel in the first half of the year. I sat down and counted - I have seven possible trips (4 international)! This is a big change from last year! What is on God’s heart for me to do vs. on my own is my big question.

Work – Honestly, I am a bit overwhelmed. I am trying not to work insane hours to keep up with everything, but I am not winning. I need a new strategy! Can you pray God will give me one?